Kickball weekly

This is the end.

My only friend, the end.

DA DA DADA DADA

The end of the kickball regular season that is. Tonight, 8 pm, on the worst fields in America, QP Live and Me: The Untold Faygo Nation Story take on nWo in a battle of "Will nWo please shut the fuck up already". But in reality, we have our last regular season game and we play an undefeated team. Since they were an known team going into the season, the schedule makers only scheduled one tough game for them all year...us. Thanks.

It's no big deal though. They are a collection of experienced players but a brand new team, so no one really knew what they were capable of. They look more like the inmate team from the movie Necessary Roughness...meaning, they are not your average kickball finesse team. They are all much bigger than anyone on our team and most of their strategy seems to be based around brute force. I like that in a team because that's what my game is based around. This reminds me of Police Academy 6 when Hightower has a punch for punch battle with the equally large criminal in the back alley. It was a pure slugfest and obviously Hightower comes out on top.

I'm pretty sure that no one on here knows anything about that movie. I loved all of the Police Academy movies, even number 6. Some would say they were all bastardizations of the first one and those people might be correct. But those people would also be on my to kill list for speaking poorly of Commandant Lasard and his unit...no homo.

After this week, the playoffs start. Next Thursday is the first round and depending on how things go tonight, we will play either the 14th, 15th or 16th ranked team. If we win, we get the 16th place team. If we lose and give up at least 8 runs or something unheard of currently though impossible, we would likely take the 3 seed.

I get nervous before most kickball games and usually assume that my team will lose. It's nothing personal to my team. It's the way I've been since I was a kid. However, as a kid, I was always playing sports like soccer or basketball that every other kid in America played and therefore was slightly better than me or my teammates. Thanks to sports like ultimate or kickball, I don't have this problem anymore...and especially thanks to the 3 people that always kick ahead of me in the lineup and usually put themselves in a win win situation to score when I come up, I don't have to be nervous really at all in kickball. But it's a hard habit to kick.

I say this because I've been nervous before pretty much every game this year and the result has been a clear victory for us each and every time. So I'm going to go ahead and be nervous but calm myself by assuming we're going to score more runs than we give up and take the regular season title tonight....and an f-ing invite to Vegas.

Of course, if I play frisbee next year, people might give me trouble for missing a practice or a tournament to go to Vegas to play kickball. I like when this happens. It's similar to when ultimate players laugh at me when I tell them my team is nationally ranked in kickball (6th in the country, fyi) because there are national rankings for frisbee too...that are equally ridiculous.

At nationals last Saturday, we were playing Sub Zero in the consolation game after we lost in the quarters. Just before the game started, one of their players yelled out to someone saying, "hey, this isn't kickball". I couldn't help but yell back, "if you guys want to play kickball, I guarantee we will. I'm nationally ranked and I'm not even kidding". They looked at me with one of those "are you serious" type looks and we then unsure if I was kidding and even seemed a little nervous that I might be telling the truth. I think it was at this point where I finally realized I've been taking this a little too far.

Lets recap a bit:

I used to hate kickball before I started pitching.
Then I declared I wanted to shutout every team we played all season.
Then some kids quit and others said the team was no fun because some people take it too seriously.
Then I was informed some teammates thought I was going to freak out when I couldn't pitch a strike after showing up to a game nearly blacked out drunk.

All of that and it took some frisbee players being unsure of what a retard just blerted out to help me come to realization. Some would say I might have some problems. I might say I might have some problems.

But none of that is an issue right now.

Right now, it's time to take on nWo....and shut them the fuck out.