Eff you Steve

The big old EFFF YOUUUUU goes to Steve's Bar Room. This was our destination for new years 2 ot 8 ("Player Hate in '08" or "Change Your Gait in '08" or pretty much some many awesome things yet determined).

But Steve's Bar Room it was for $75 "open bar" all you can drink...only:

1. Rail drinks only
2. No beers included
3. Only one of the bars (the place had a total of 2) were open to the "open bar" deal
4. Champagne was only free until midnight
5. Poor showing by the bartenders

So we get into this potentially rad place.

Let's start over.

New Years for this guy started at work. Great. I roll out around 4, go home, get ready and off to dinner the doctor and I go to meet some friends around 7. Our awesome drink deal doesn't start until 10, so when most people don't show up to dinner until 8, we don't really mind at all. I started to mind at 9:45 when we had, at that point, been waiting for the check for 20 minutes.

So we end up in line for Steve's Bar Room at 10:15 and are inside and ordering our first drink by 10:30. I was way too sober for this environment. It's bass thumping, shitty tatoo having club scene to the nth degree, but I'm like "just get a drink and stand in the corner and all will be well."

Me: "Can I get a Grey Goose and Tonic?"
Bartender: "Rail drinks only"

It was Zelko vodka. I hadn't drank Zelko since freshman year when the Otis and I were walking down F Street and he offered me a sip of his vodka out of the plastic bottle and I almost booted it back up. So after half of this drink, I go to the back bar and order champagne. The bartender tells me the back bar is not for the all you can drink special but is kind enough to acquiesce this one time.

Since it's a wanna be club, I decide it's wanna be baller time after I finish my Zelko and Champagne. I head back to the front bar and ask for a full bottle of champagne...he tells me "You have to tip a little better than that." So I give him a $5 tip on top of the $150 I already paid to get in this shitty bar (like the gentleman I am, I bought the Doctor's ticket) and the $108 I got to spend on dinner. So as I near the $300 new years expense, I'm in a pretty good mood.

But now it's hand out time because I have my own bottle, right? Wrong. Stingy is a good way to describe my generosity. So after a bottle of champagne and a couple of other drinks, things are starting to get better. More of our friends have arrived and things become more fun.

At this point, it's 11:40 and the DJ makes the announcement that champagne is no longer free at midnight and you get a free copy of his shitty cd on the way out...NICE.

So I head to the bar with the Doctor, figuring it'd be easier to for her to get service. Armed with $10, we aim to get 2 bottles of champagne. The parents mistake that this guy was, he tells her that he can't just give out bottles to people. She shows him the $10, takes it, hands out 1 bottle and walks away. NICE.

So we head back to the group with this new bottle and sense of wanting to drown all employees, except the 6'4 bouncer, who was

A) the largest person at the bar by 50 pounds and
B) standing in the most narrow part of the bar all night.

Midnight comes, songs are sang, music is played, drinks are drunk and the place starts to clear out a little. I then engage one of my friends in conversation only to have some employee with haircut that can only be described as attack of the flowbee (he had bushy hair, but in the middle had pushed up what i guess could be called a really bad mohawk...i'd never seen anything like it and can't describe it for the life of me) come over and ask us if everything is OK and that no one is fighting here. I reiterate that to him by saying I'm talking to my friend and he should go away...or kick Topshelf out because Topshelf was hammered and fell over twice previous.

So that was just like a little nightcap. We left around 1:30 I think, nothing too special...Though, on the way out we did see a girl fall while walking towards a cab. That was pretty funny. I looked to my right and saw a girl walking and then she just up and disappeared. You can't write that any better than it was.

So that was my waste of all my money new years. I'm pretty sure that anywhere in DC would have been a rip off for all you can drink but I can only hope they would have advertised it a lot better. The only thing they did tell us ahead of time was champagne stopped at midnight. If you say open bar, you better fucking tell someone that it's rail drinks only. I've never felt more scammed in my life. This place was feeding off of fucking people over.

The bar itself was set up all fucked up too. You walk in and you're in a room the size of an average living room. If you walk around the back for awhile, you find another lounge with the 2nd bar. That's where we were all night. If these people were smart instead of just dicks, they would knock down the walls between the two rooms and have a huge open area that would be a perfect set up for a club or bar. 1 gigantic room is much better than two bedrooms with the worlds most unnecessary wall of all time.

I'd apologize for the negative post, but shit, player hate in '08 mofukas.