I can't be held responsible for the things I say or write...

8.11.2007

hard god damn work

i've been offended. it happened tonight at the dc club mixer.

it's hard to offend me generally. why? because i understand that with the words that come out of my mouth, i have to let a lot of shit wash off to the side. that being said, i don't stand for certain things. i don't let drunk chicks smack me. it's just not something i put up with. if you know the kind of girl that thinks it's funny to slap a man in the face while hammered, please inform her that i will smack her right the fuck back...not hard, but she will get touched up because those are the rules. never do something to a person that you wouldn't be able to be brought back equally on you...mofuka.

anyway, i open my mouth a lot and that's just what i do. but tonight...tonight, i was called out hard without even doing a g d thing. a lot of times people will say some shit like they were minding their own business and then someone just opened up out of nowhere, but that's not what this was like.

so we're at this party and i'm entertaining this new guy in town and his lady friend (not girlfriend, but a friend who is a lady). turns out she is a popular lady and none of the other ladies want her to leave. however, with her wake up time being 5:15 and the friend who brought her being ready to fall asleep in the middle of the party, it was time to go. i was designated phone and key holder...interesting idea since i had lost all knowledge of this responsibility approx. 10 minutes after keys and phone were in my pocket, but that's not my problem because my wake up time is hopefully when i come out of a coma in 2035.

anyway, so as we're walking away, this chick comes running down the street telling the girl who is walking with me and my friend that she can't leave with us because my friend is engaged and i'm not hot enough to fuck. verbatim.

ouch.

i'm sorry.

what.

what.

what.

what.

um.

so i guess i can understand what it's like to be on the other end of what i bring, but what bitch?

not hot enough to fuck? excuse me bitch... I'M ENGAGED. this is why people who are engaged need rings....well, guys who are engaged need rings. i was offended on a new level, but i felt pretty bad for not being called out for being engaged. truthfully, i thought it was fucked up that a kid who was just walking without bothering anyone or in anyway communicating with the girl who was walking with him and his friend was told he was not hot enough to fuck the girl.

i mean, that's just wrong.

it's not like the girl who called me out was hot. she's 19 years old and not unattractive, but come on. if you're going to call a 6'1, 193 man out for not being hot enough, you might as well be proportionally smaller than he...you fucking unfucked bitch. better yet, next time you get boned, call me and i'll holler at the police because your parents too pity on that shit. ho.

i guess i should be able to take my own medicine, but this is not my style. i don't go offensive for the sake of pure offensiveness. i go offensive because it's funny...which i guess this was, but still. it's only funny if you know who it is you holler at and under what circumstance.


but i guess in retrospect, it was pretty fucking mean...which makes it pretty funny.

i hate losing...and i definitely lost that battle....of course i didn't know there was a war to fight, but shit. let this be a lesson that your A game is completely necessary at all times.

2 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Oh man, totally reminds me of this incident I had during my time in college. In case you don't know, I went to a college with a gender ratio of 4 guys to every girl. When that happens, many women will "let themselves go"

So there I was, minding my own business just before my Intro to Engineering Design class started where this chunky girl that sits next to me starts flirting with me (as she did on a regular basis). So her big, fat sorority sister across the classroom starts calling out "Melanie, NOOOOOO!"

Melanie, the chunky girl, does not seem to notice, but I do. So I glance over to her fat sorority sister and she's shaking her head. At this point, I didn't really notice what was going on. So I continue to let Melanie flirt with me as she is a nice, sweet girl after all. Her fat sorority friend keeps on calling to her "Melanieeeeee NOOOOOOOO!"

Melanie seems completely oblivious to her fat sorority sister for the time being, but finally her sorority sister gains her attention momentarily. When the two finally make eye contact, the fat sorority girl says, "He's not cute enough!"

I mean, WTF?

- Wolsty

11:34 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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4:21 AM

 

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