I can't be held responsible for the things I say or write...


Opening Day

Tonight is Opening Night of the baseball season!!!! The games in Japan last week technically were the first of the season, but who gets up to watch baseball at 6:30 in the morning besides the fans of the teams playing? Actually, the answer is pretty simple: since there are no A's fans that would wake up at 3:30 am to watch, Red Sox fans. That's who. I can only hope that all of the players get whatever virus all the Yankees players got when they came back from Japan 4 years ago. Oh wait, that was the combination of sushi and steroids that did them in, so I guess the Red Sox players are likely in the clear...no pun intended.

Anyway, tonight is the first game at Nationals Park, which is A) a good name for a stadium, particularly because it's not named after some corporation and B) pretty cool, since there was all this drama three years ago about building the stadium, will the team stay in DC, yada yada yada. All is good.

But I have to ask, for those of you that were at the game or those of you who watched or will see the highlights, but did you boo when President Bush was brought out to throw the first pitch? It's a tradition for the standing President to throw out the first pitch at the first home game of the season in DC. Tonight marked the 48th time the President did it. I wonder if any others had been booed before.

Now, I'm not a republican, but not really a democrat. I don't agree with all that's happened in the past 8 years and there is no way I currently know enough about politics to be able to tell you one way or another if Bush really is the devil that all the hippies cry him out to be. Even if I had strong opinions one way or another, I probably wouldn't boo the President if he is throwing out the first pitch. Why?

First, I find it embarrassing. Not just for DC but for the country. If the President was invited to throw the first pitch at other stadiums around the country, I bet the fans would consider it an honor. Perhaps DC area folk don't understand the privilege that it is to have the leader of your country ceremoniously begin the game. I find it embarrassing for our country because it shows a lack of respect for our leaders. Yes, it's been the running joke to laugh at Bush for his general public speaking issues or to find the urge to put "Impeach Bush" stickers on your cars and all, but still, I would not boo.

But maybe that's the beauty of the whole free country thing. We don't get hanged for expressing our opinions, which is a good thing. I just think it's an honor to have someone like the President, no matter his approval rating, participating in a long standing tradition that was lost for years when there was no DC team. I would respect this tradition enough to applaud it and forget [my] opinions on the figurehead continuing it.


how about that

i go from the picture in the below post to this youtube video...it's somber, but touching none the less:

Walter Schneller was my neighbor growing up and one of my best friends in that time was his son. Growing up on the campus of the school pretty much made all faculty children friends, even though I was younger by 4 years to the majority of the other kids.

Not much else to say but I think it's a touching salute that Keith Olbermann will devote time in his show to someone he met over 30 years previous. It's nice to see those kinds of feelings and emotions for someone you knew at such an early part of your life. I'm 27 years old and have lost touch with numerous acquaintances, teachers and friends over the short 9 years it's been since high school ended. I'm not alone in this either, as anyone reading this undoubtedly has done the same.

I watched this on Countdown last night and thought it was nice, until the final 20 seconds when the camera came back on Olbermann and he had his touching comments on the way Mr. Schneller affects his life to this day. My favorite part was the final word, "Goodbye". No rest in peace. Something about the finality of the goodbye touched me more than the rest of the 1.5 minute farewell.


just because it's funny



Outtie 5000

Today is the day where all 4th year med students around the country find out which residency programs they get accepted to. Today is the day where the doctor finds out where she gets to play doctor...no, she hasn't been playing "doctor" with any of you so don't even make that lame joke (NOTE: I had written the above alluded to joke and decided it was way too lame to throw in so don't go plagiarizing my non written words...bitch).

There is this ceremony where you show up at 11:30 am and all these future doctors are drinking champagne. Each student has ranked a bunch of schools and none know which one their going to end up at until they open the envelope. Some people rank a bunch of schools and get ones low on their list. Some only rank a few (for the more competitive programs) and don't always get any of their choices due to the competition. It's all based on where the program you interviewed at ranks you compared to where you rank them.

Well, those of you that know her know she is a talented person, even for a woman. PSYCH. women are people too even if they have smaller brains than men...guess that makes me a chick? i thought those were just extra pound boobies not estrogen boobies.

What the hell just happened? ANYWAY, the doctor found out today that she got accepted at her #1 choice, being St. Luke's hospital in Manhattan. The Live family is moving to NYC!

Oh that's awesome, right? Well, yes and no. It's exciting because we're off to a new place where we will have to make new friends and we'll be married so we're completely moving into the unknown. We'll have to do things like go out with other couples and engage in swingers parties.

It's terrifying because I will have to get a new job. The word "complacency" comes to mind when I think of my current job. I've been there 3.5 years and miserable for 2.0 of them yet I am still there. So going out and finding a new one, something I didn't do in a city that I know pretty well, is kind of intimidating...but there's no holding back now. I have to find and job and I don't want to be a paralegal, so that pretty much means I'm starting over...or pretty much means I can do anything...or pretty much means I have no idea what I am going to end up doing but I should look forward to this, I guess.

But it's sad. We've been in DC since 1999 as freshman at GW. In that time, we've grown up, because new people and then changed that person and then changed again and again...and we've done that with a lot of the people who read this right here. So it's sad to be moving away from all of you who have had a major part in shaping who we are as people. For example, I'm an angry man who plays kickball. WOW, you guys fucked up big time. JUST KIDDING JUST KIDDING. I kid because I love. And I love kids. Especially little ones. KIDDING, AGAIN JUST KIDDING. Half kidding.

Anywho, the time has come for QP Live and the doctor to move their asses up out of town. If I'm certain of anything it's that I'm uncertain about all of this. And I'm certain I'm not the first person to say that.

But, for now, I have things like quitting my job, getting married and finishing up a trial to do. Which is rad.

But to you all DC mofukas, peace out...don't fret though because I'm told I'll be back in 3 years. But I'll likely be very, very, big pun fat by then with all the pizza, chicken cutlet and italian combos. AWESOME!



South Carolina....still not awesome.

2.5 weeks later and there is still officially nothing to do in the not great state of SC. There is really nothing to do besides work, because when you're not working, there is nothing else to do.

However, all that changes today because I get to go home on a 6 pm flight. Now, one week ago I was going home right up until this exact time right now only to be told I would in fact be staying here to work on everyone else's work...that's not totally true. I was staying because the lead paralegal in charge has a task a retarded monkey could do but nonetheless has assigned that task to herself, meaning she "doesn't have time for her other responsibilities." Cool, my work load just tripled. true story.

But this time I actually get to go home and for like 4 days. No court between tomorrow and Tuesday, meaning in what attorneys have called the slowest trial ever, there are cool things like 4 days off for no good reason. I understand the Easter holiday might give some reason to having Thursday and Friday off and maybe even throw in Monday as a travel day, but what the deuce on Tuesday? People have to get back in town to take care of wedding stuff, damn, it's like this stranger isn't even taking into account all this stuff I have to accomplish in EXACTLY ONE MONTH.

That is today, March 19. One month from the day where I Do's are uttered, my drunk friends, aka you bastards, make inappropriate comments to mine and the doctor's families including drunk awkward conversation that in your mind could lead to something romantic with one of our family members only in their mind will lead to their military relatives drowning you in the Baltimore Harbor. But no, keep taking, I'm sure it will work out for you.

And a pleasant request, April 19 is not your day to exact revenge for all of the inappropriate comments or actions I've thrown your way in the past. Be a mature adult and wait until my funeral for that shit. And it's not like the funeral can really be that far off. I eat steak at every meal (it's what did Curly in) (well, that was bacon but they're close anyway), we drink roughly every night, we drive intentionally like assholes down here (though that's mostly a co worker of mine trying to freak me out) and, AND AND, I jaywalk at least once a day.

I'd love to fill you in on all the rad times we've had here. There was this one night, we were at a bar, we had like 3 beers and dinner. Man, that was a good time. OH, I totally forgot! The fire alarm went off at my hotel. There was no fire but the alarm did go off.

Seriously though, the best thing that happened to me since I've been down here is Hulu. Free movies and TV. can't complain about that. Well, I guess I can complain about this:

I watched "The Skulls" which has Charlie from the Mighty Ducks. I think some of you know him for Dawson's Creek as the kid who bones the teacher, but he's Captain Duck to me. Anyway, The Skulls are a secret society at Yale and it's got all the guys you hate playing miserable roles and doing really bad acting. At no point are any characters explained or does anything make sense in this whole thing but it was a decent watch for someone who has spent hour after hour in front of a computer for the last 2.5 weeks. The movie ends in the greatest way possible: absolutely no closure. On the unintentional comedy scale, it only ranks behind "Twister" as funniest serious line every.

In "Twister", as Bill Paxton and the Helen Hunt are driving down the highway chasing a tornedo, Helen Hunt goes "Oh no" and Bill Paxton goes, "Yeah, horizontal rain" as if that was supposed to be like this huge development and the audience was supposed to do a collective gasp. I burst out laughing and to this day will see that movie is on TBS, turn to is and try to catch that part. If I can't, or if I see any mention to this movie and am around other people, I will always let them know about the horizontal rain line. Movies just need inspirational lines like this for people like me to watch over and over again.

But in "The Skulls", Charlie has always wanted to be a Skull and then all this drama happens and in the end he's like "I don't want to be a Skull". The Skull who pretty much saved his life is all, "I'm going to call on you to pay back this favor, always a Skull blah blah blah" and Charlie's like "I owe you nothing, eff the Skulls" and then the older Skull is like "Can you live knowing that I still might come calling" and Charlie's like "Yeah, I can live with that." Unintentionally funny right? WRONG. The next line, as Charlie is walking off, the older Skull, to no one, just out loud drops the line "Good work son. Good work." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Unintentionally HI-FREAKING-LARIOUS. The only thing funnier than that line was the close up on his face as he said it.

That's my report. Hope it made you hungry.


Edit to previous post

There is hope!!!! Thanks to whatever commentor is out there and said that the finale of The Wire is not in fact available on demand this week. As I don't have on demand in Dixie, I was unaware of this and now am extremely relieved and excited to miss the finale on Sunday, since I will be back down here and unlikely to see it due to work...but maybe I'll catch the replay.

otis, was that you? Nice work OTIS!

The South shall rise again

i'm down in columbia south carolina. on one street corner, there were two large BBQ places right next to each other. When I say large, I mean LARGE. And one of them had a giant pig standing up out front holding up a giant sign. Granted, this was not a live pig, but it got the point across that it was a bbq place...and I could smell the bbq from a block away.

a block away from the office we are working in, a confederate flag is hung atop a flag pole in front of the state house. granted, this is not on top of the building itself, but i'm not in the union anymore.

I'm in a different place than I'm used to and everything here has either the word "fried" or "steak" in it. It's amazing. It's not the ideal place to be when you are trying to get fit right before a wedding but what can you do.

In case you don't know what I reside presently in SC, I'm at trial with the case I've been working on for the last 2 years. All things considered, I'd prefer to be down here at this stage. Why? Well,

1. After 2 years, actually being at trial means this case will go away soon and I might have a life that involves weekends and not having to say to people when trying to make plans "So long as I don't get called into work."

2. Working down here has been a lot more relaxing that working in DC...probably because I don't have to wear a tie, have more streamlined work to do and projects don't just get dropped on me out of nowhere.

3. We're working in a conference room that has 5 of us in it and 2 TVs that we watch CNN during the day and sitcoms and Law & Order at night. All bitch work like copying gets outsourced to a copying company on the 2nd floor. We're on the 17th floor and have a view of downtown Columbia. Not the greatest city to have a view of, but there are no 17 floor building in DC, so it's fun. Plus they have these rad counters that have refrigerated drawers so we have plenty of cold bottled water.

4. Everything I do is paid for. All meals are expensed, dry cleaning and laundry are charged to the room and I don't pay that, drinks are usually with people who make a lot more than me, so I don't pay it and we go out to really nice restaurants.

But all of this honeymoon ends Sunday when we gear up to actually go to trial. It starts Monday and will be a total shit show very soon. I'll be here anywhere for 1 to 4 more weeks...until the wedding.

So that's what I've been getting myself into. I decided while I'm down here that one day I'm going to decorate my house with the items that I think i see out of the corner of my eye. You know, the things that make you do a double take. Like when you think you see an alligator crawling out of a plant and do a double take but it turns out it's own overgrown leaves? Yeah, that kind of thing. I'm going to build half an alligator and have that bitch be crawling out of a plant. People will come over and say "Oh, i thought that was just the leaves but it turns out it's an alligator climbing out of a plant" and then I'll say "yeah. sweet, right?" Then the person will likely leave and not allow his or her children to associate with my children.

But that's been happening a lot to me lately. I think I'm seeing things that seem highly illogical and do a double take only to realize that it was not in fact what I thought I saw. Maybe I'm just tired or my eyes have gone to shit because of all the staring at computers I do. Or maybe those things are actually there when I first see them but some matrix shit makes it turn back to what the blue pill tells me it should be.

The Wire's final episode airs on HBO Sunday night. I was watching some clips on youtube yesterday and trying to be careful not to watch anything from the final episode until some asshole posted a comment that gives away something in the finale. I was pretty angry...actually, not so much angry as I was really upset that this was brought to light. It's a show I really like, so finding out about anything in it before it happens really takes away from the enjoyment. I started watching the show a year ago and made a point to only watch from the beginning. I had watched 2 episodes of season 4 before I decided to watch the entire series and I knew something that took away from the finale of that season...I was really looking forward to this not happening again, but now it has and it sucks.

HBO started putting the new episodes out on demand the Monday after the latest episode would air on Sunday, meaning each new episode is available 1 week in advance. I had made it this far without having anything spoiled until this piece of shit on youtube. So now I think i know what happens, but I hope it happens early so it doesn't take away from the full episode.

As a disclaimer, there are people who read this who are currently only on seasons 3 or 4, so please don't post any comments about what might have happened or what happened, etc. Don't ruin it for them please.

well, i had this time to shotaholler to all of you. Sorry if this lacked the traditional shock value of stupidity, but I just needed to kill some time and thought i should help people get through their friday